Changing order doesn't necessarily mean that anyone's whispering... anyone just looking at the chat page from a bit of inactivity will always jump to top on the list. So any kind of assumptions regarding what any user is doing to bring them on top of the list are guesswork at best. But yea, I think that we'd all love to see "regular" private chats in separate tabs like with every other chat app. Whispers are cute for a remark or two, but they're way too clunky to use for "proper" private chats. Hopefully proper 1:1 private chat tabs will make it in too.