"I am so sorry you are having trouble with your MySQL server! Although the
server was restarted recently, that was only part of the issue. Looking
at the size of your database (3GB +), it is actually becoming too large
for shared hosting. If you continue to host your database on a shared
MySQL server, the performance is going to continue to degrade. Either you
try to optimize the database (contact Xenforo for assistance), or
consider upgrading to a MySQL VPS. I honestly recommend reducing the size
of the database, as the issue, like I said, will get worse over time."
Unfortunately, we've not had good experience with their tech support and I'm not convinced they aren't just trying to pass off what is their problem on to us. But I'm afraid my knowledge level on a lot of the server management is novice at best.
Is there some optimization I can do to see if this actually does help the issue?