What do to in the first date with a girl?


Active member
What things do you think that a guy should do (and should not do) in the first date with a girl that he wants as a girlfriend?

Wanna share your experience?


Well-known member
ooook kind of a strange place to ask this kind of question :confused:
But yeah, just be yourself.


Well-known member
Be yourself... :)

agreed... unless you are a boring, sexist slob............ then be someone else :)



but seriously, if she agreed to a date, it is because she saw some potential in you, so ergo, she likes you already, just be the same as you have been with her previously, do make sure to *not* monopolise the conversation, asking questions (that are not too personal) is good, be interested, interested is interesting... just doing be creepy stalker interested :eek:


Good luck to you :)


Well-known member
...asking questions (that are not too personal) is good, be interested, interested is interesting....
but avoid making it seem like an interrogation, or an application interview.

also avoid discussion of the ex. particularly badmouthing of the ex. worse yet, revealing secrets that the ex had trusted you to keep private.


Well-known member
I joked because the best and brightest had already answered. Be yourself. Don't try to act like you are a helicopter pilot, don't lie about what you do or who you are and don't exaggerate anything. Because if you find a girl you like and have based the mutual attraction on lies nothing good will come of it.

Be yourself, stay relaxed. Have fun and don't look at every girl you see as someone who would look nice in your bed. When you do these things you won't HAVE to look for a girl, you'll just discover one day that she's there. And you'll wonder how it happened.

steven s

Well-known member
When you do these things you won't HAVE to look for a girl, you'll just discover one day that she's there. And you'll wonder how it happened.
That's how it usually happens. Meet my wife online 26 years ago. Wasn't even looking.

Fred Sherman

Well-known member
Yep, better to ask in other place regarding this matter.
I'll give you a serious answer.

First and foremost, when you go to pick this girl up, out of respect for her and her parents, you walk up to the front door looking presentable, and knock on the door. Nothing pissed me off more than a boy who who pick one of my daughters up by calling her cell phone from the curb. And don't ever consider the horn either.

You shake her father's hand and you call him sir. Trust me on that one. You ask what time she needs to be home and you giver her parents YOUR cell number. As you leave, you tell them it was a pleasure meeting them. You walk the girl to the car and open the door for her. Parents are still watching. Do all this and you have weathered the first hurdle.

Take the young lady out to dinner. Choose someplace quiet, but not expensive. You aren't trying to impress her, you're trying to make an impression based on who you really are. Quiet is good and gives you an atmosphere to talk. Conversation should be 50/50. You want to learn about her and give her a chance to learn about you. Its sort of like a job interview. You're both trying to see if this is a good match. An added tip: review the menu of the restaraunt online so you have a good idea of cost. Not every waking moment needs to be filled with conversation, but avoid awkward silences too.

Dinner and a movie might be the cliche, but its also a bad first date idea. You don't get to interact during a movie and you lose each other in the story of the movie. Some type of activity works better. I used to take my dates out to minature golf. No one is good at it, so no one feels outdone. Its low pressure fun. Just avoid two things: don't play hard to try to beat her and don't tank on purpose. Either are bad form and says more about you than you know.

During the summer, when the days are longer, an early dinner and horseback riding worked good too. You have to match the season and what you have available.

Finish up with a trip to the ice cream shop (they still have those right, or I'm going to look really old). A milkshake and a sundae are a good end.

I'll assume she is a proper young lady and has a curfew. Make sure you get her home with time to spare. Nothing sours the first date more than her freaking out about the possibility of being late. Once, my car got a flat tire on the way back 30 minutes before my date had to be home. I had time to call her father (actually, my father called hers - CB radio, before cell phones) with our location so he could either pick her up or at least be aware we'd be late. Plan for the unexpected.

When you take her home, walk her up to the front door. You job is not complete until she is safely in that house. If her parents are home, wonderful. If not, my rule was simple. I stayed by the front door until she would turn on the outside light to let me know everything was okay.

Now you have to be wondering about that goodnight kiss, AKA the most awkward moment in dating. Want the best solution? Don't do it. Why end a date with awkwardness? Why ruin several hours of a good time with 5 minutes of confusion or mixed signals.

I will tell you what a guy who dated my youngest daughter did on her first date that she still talks about. During the evening, he let her know that he doesn't kiss on the first date. Its not a prudish thing, its simple respect because he should know that it is welcomed before trying. What he said is if she decided on a second date, he'd giver her a hello kiss instead, so the decision was completely in her control.

And for goodness sake, if you say you're going to call her, do it. Never lie about that. Even if all you do is call to say all you want is to be friends, that it didn't work out quite like you'd hoped.

And the most important advice? If any of the women posting her disagree with anything I've said, listen to them. They're women and I'm a guy which means I know nothing about women. Besides, I haven't had a first date in myself in almost 30 years. Although I have seen plenty thanks to two daughters who luckily took after their mothers.

There you go - a serious answer full of fatherly advice.