Sent around from Thomas Cook Holidays -
listing some of the guest's complaints during the season.
1. "I think it should be explained in the brochure that the local
store does not sell proper biscuits like custard creams or ginger
nuts."
2. "It's lazy of the local shopkeepers to close in the afternoons. I
often needed to buy things during 'siesta' time - this should be
banned
3. "On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that
almost every restaurant served curry. I don't like spicy food at all."
4. "We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had
to bring our swimming costumes and towels."
5. A tourist at a top African game lodge over looking a water hole,
who spotted a visibly aroused elephant, complained that the sight of
this rampant beast ruined his honeymoon by making him feel
"inadequate".
6. "The beach was too sandy."
7. "We found the sand was not like the sand in the brochure. Your
brochure shows the sand as yellow but it was white."
8. "Topless sunbathing on the beach should be banned. The holiday
was ruined as my husband spent all day looking at other women."
9. "We bought 'Ray-Ban' sunglasses for five Euros (£3.50) from a
street trader, only to find out they were fake."
10. "No-one told us there would be fish in the sea. The children
were startled."
11. "There was no egg slicer in the apartment..."
12. "We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the taxi
drivers as they were all Spanish..."
13. "The roads were uneven.."
14. "It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England it only
took the Americans three hours to get home."
15. "I compared the size of our one-bedroom apartment to our friends'
three-bedroom apartment and ours was significantly smaller."
16. "The brochure states: 'No hairdressers at the accommodation'. We
are all trainee hairdressers - will we be OK staying here?"
17. "There were too many Spanish people. The receptionist speaks
Spanish. The food is Spanish. Too many foreigners."
18. "We had to queue outside with no air conditioning."
19. "It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or
unruly guests before we travel."
20. "I was bitten by a mosquito - no-one said they could bite."
21. "My fiancé and I booked a twin-bedded room but we were placed in
a double-bedded room. We now hold you responsible for the fact that I
find myself pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us
in the room that we booked."
listing some of the guest's complaints during the season.
1. "I think it should be explained in the brochure that the local
store does not sell proper biscuits like custard creams or ginger
nuts."
2. "It's lazy of the local shopkeepers to close in the afternoons. I
often needed to buy things during 'siesta' time - this should be
banned
3. "On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that
almost every restaurant served curry. I don't like spicy food at all."
4. "We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had
to bring our swimming costumes and towels."
5. A tourist at a top African game lodge over looking a water hole,
who spotted a visibly aroused elephant, complained that the sight of
this rampant beast ruined his honeymoon by making him feel
"inadequate".
6. "The beach was too sandy."
7. "We found the sand was not like the sand in the brochure. Your
brochure shows the sand as yellow but it was white."
8. "Topless sunbathing on the beach should be banned. The holiday
was ruined as my husband spent all day looking at other women."
9. "We bought 'Ray-Ban' sunglasses for five Euros (£3.50) from a
street trader, only to find out they were fake."
10. "No-one told us there would be fish in the sea. The children
were startled."
11. "There was no egg slicer in the apartment..."
12. "We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the taxi
drivers as they were all Spanish..."
13. "The roads were uneven.."
14. "It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England it only
took the Americans three hours to get home."
15. "I compared the size of our one-bedroom apartment to our friends'
three-bedroom apartment and ours was significantly smaller."
16. "The brochure states: 'No hairdressers at the accommodation'. We
are all trainee hairdressers - will we be OK staying here?"
17. "There were too many Spanish people. The receptionist speaks
Spanish. The food is Spanish. Too many foreigners."
18. "We had to queue outside with no air conditioning."
19. "It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or
unruly guests before we travel."
20. "I was bitten by a mosquito - no-one said they could bite."
21. "My fiancé and I booked a twin-bedded room but we were placed in
a double-bedded room. We now hold you responsible for the fact that I
find myself pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us
in the room that we booked."
You'd need a lot of applications for that one 
that way my brain is wired 24/7 
