Attachment max size?

"Not allowed" according to who? You can disable it if you want. There are upsides and downsides to using/not using it, but there shouldn't be anyone telling you that you aren't allowed... Unless it's your work website and your boss/manager has a policy to use it or something.
You're better off opening a thread about all that. There's no one-size fits all (otherwise there wouldn't be options you can set). I was just telling you what's going on... how you want to set it up is up to you.

your host should have the maximum size of what you can use.

don't use proxies as it sounds like more work you don't need. Proxies allow spammers to post up their viruses and other things you don't need.
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