On VB I was using the MGC Chatbox Evo. It was a near perfect solution for me.
I can get the chatbox up and do something like that but the 1v1 options that MGC chatbox evo had are a mystery to me! I've no idea how to go about doing that.
I'm keeping an eye on TaigaChat as it looks promising but many of my members enjoy the exclusive chats between themselves and their groups.
I don't want IRC and most of my members dislike flash. For now I'm using envolve but I'd just like to see something like MGC chatbox evo on Xenforo.