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Doctor, that's exactly the problem: nobody knows. I don't think that XenForo are assuming everyone is a pirate; I think they can't afford to assume that they aren't. That's entirely reasonable.

If it's someone you know personally, then you may well be in a position to judge their sincerity. But talk is cheap, and anyone can insincerely claim to have a sincere interest in purchasing. Again, nobody knows. XenForo have no way of distinguishing the truly sincere from those who are only feigning sincerity. And I can understand if they would rather not have other people (no matter how well-intentioned they may be) making such judgements on their behalf when after all it's their resources that are on the line.