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I would think the best way to go about this would be to have each warning start a conversation with the user, an option already supported by XenForo.  This would allow you to communicate every individual offense, rather than only the last offense--the one that pushes them over the point threshold.  It would also give them an opportunity to learn prior to being banned.

Once they're banned, they've lost their opportunity to learn, at least until enough warnings expire to bring them below the ban threshold.  At that point, they have access to their conversations again anyway.