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The American Language. :D

jonsidneyb

Well-known member
#1
In order to not take another thread too far off topic I moved my response to a brand new thread. :p

This originated in this thread.

http://xenforo.com/community/threads/california-case-update.10037/page-77

Which is lazyyyyyyyy, *******ised, English. (y)
We had no choice but the create an American version of it for ourselves. :D

Examples:

Aluminum vs Aluminium: It is your word but you started with Aluminum and we accepted it. We stuck it in our dictionary and everything. Well five years later it got changed to Aluminium, what where we going to do with all of those dictionaries. We rebelled as that is what Colonials are known to do. It was not the Colonials fault you changed your minds and it was not worth redoing all of those otherwise perfectly good dictionaries. :eek:

Now lets go back in time.

Once there was this.

Fæder ure þu þe eart on heofonum
Si þin nama gehalgod
to becume þin rice
gewurþe ðin willa
on eorðan swa swa on heofonum.
urne gedæghwamlican hlaf syle us todæg
and forgyf us ure gyltas
swa swa we forgyfað urum gyltendum
and ne gelæd þu us on costnunge
ac alys us of yfele soþlice

Hmmm, this is Old English but you guys must have got tired of it. :confused:

Moving along in time we end up with this.

Lauerd me steres, noght wante sal me:
In stede of fode þare me louked he.
He fed me ouer watre ofe fode,
Mi saule he tornes in to gode.
He led me ouer sties of rightwisenes,
For his name, swa hali es.
For, and ife .I. ga in mid schadw ofe dede,
For þou wiþ me erte iuel sal .i. noght drede;
Þi yherde, and þi stafe ofe mighte,
Þai ere me roned dai and nighte.
Þou graiþed in mi sighte borde to be,

That was Middle English. :cautious:

Here is some Geoffrey Chaucer.

"Ye knowe ek that in forme of speeche is chaunge
Withinne a thousand yeer, and wordes tho
That hadden pris, now wonder nyce and straunge
Us thinketh hem, and yet thei spake hem so,
And spedde as wel in love as men now do;
Ek for to wynnen love in sondry ages,
In sondry londes, sondry ben usages." :oops:

We Colonials had to do something. The language kept changing so what where we to do? We never got new official dictionaries or instructions. We took matters into our own hands. :p

Well the Colonials being really the same people found in the UK discovered they could not stop the changes any better. :whistle:

Since Mother England would not keep us up to date on all the changes we did what people do when they don't have instructions, we made it up as we went along just like was being done in the UK. :LOL: Now if you would have sent us a list of all the changes as they happened we might have done better but then again we refused to budge on Aluminum. :ROFLMAO:

Why didn't you guys stick with Gaelic? It was spoken there before English. ;)
 

whynot

Well-known member
#5
I am hard at work *******ising the English language. This is hard work ya know. :D
Changing of the English Language

Having chosen English as the preferred language in the EEC, the European
Parliament has commissioned a feasibility study in ways of improving
efficiency in communications between Government departments.

European officials have often pointed out that English spelling is
unnecessarily difficult - for example, cough, plough, rough, through and
thorough. What is clearly needed is a phased programme of changes to
iron out these anomalies. The programme would, of course, be
administered by a committee staff at top level by participating nations.

In the first year, for example, the committee would suggest using 's'
instead of the soft 'c'. Sertainly, sivil servants in all sities would
resieve this news with joy. Then the hard 'c' could be replaced by 'k'
sinse both letters are pronounsed alike. Not only would this klear up
konfusion in the minds of klerikal workers, but typewriters kould be
made with one less letter.

There would be growing enthusiasm when in the sekond year, it kould be
announsed that the troublesome 'ph' would henseforth be written 'f'.
This would make words like 'fotograf' twenty per sent shorter in print.

In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted
to reash the stage where more komplikated shanges are possible.
Governments would enkourage the removal of double letters which have
always been a deterent to akurate speling.

We would al agre that the horible mes of silent 'e's in the languag is
disgrasful. Therefor we kould drop thes and kontinu to read and writ as
though nothing had hapend. By this tim it would be four years sins the
skem began and peopl would be reseptive to steps sutsh as replasing 'th'
by 'z'. Perhaps zen ze funktion of 'w' kould be taken on by 'v', vitsh
is, after al, half a 'w'. Shortly after zis, ze unesesary 'o kould be
dropd from words kontaining 'ou'. Similar arguments vud of kors be aplid
to ozer kombinations of leters.

Kontinuing zis proses yer after yer, ve vud eventuli hav a reli sensibl
riten styl. After tventi yers zer vud be no mor trubls, difikultis and
evrivun vud fin it ezi tu understand ech ozer. Ze drems of the Guvermnt
vud finali hav kum tru.
 

Fufu

Well-known member
#6
American English is by far the hardest language to learn.
Ask any American if they can answer a few of the TOEFL questions correctly.
 

Ranger375

Well-known member
#7
It works both ways. Going into any pub in the UK, it's like listening to another language. I'd be rich if I had a nickel for each time I said "What?"
:D
 

DroidHost

Well-known member
#8
mmm I am a native Arabic speaker and let me say English is not that great ..... it is some how stupid ! and in contrast Arabic is rich in meninges ... simple enough in English you would say a free man which you mean he has his Freedom but in Arabic we have a Word for that رجل حر

give me a 1000 years old book and I will read it without any extra studying ! and I will go from Saudi Arabia to any other part of the Arabic world and I will understand them !!

(y)
 

---MAD---

Well-known member
#10
mmm I am a native Arabic speaker and let me say English is not that great ..... it is some how stupid ! and in contrast Arabic is rich in meninges ... simple enough in English you would say a free man which you mean he has his Freedom but in Arabic we have a Word for that رجل حر

give me a 1000 years old book and I will read it without any extra studying ! and I will go from Saudi Arabia to any other part of the Arabic world and I will understand them !!

(y)
You will understand their books but not the way they speak (not always anyway). Dialects vary widely in the Arab world as I am sure you know :).
 

Peggy

Well-known member
#14
American English is by far the hardest language to learn.
Ask any American if they can answer a few of the TOEFL questions correctly.
I will absolutely agree with that. It is the hardest to learn, and much of it makes little sense.
 

Danny.VBT

Active member
#15
Below, an excerpt from James Joyce's Ulysses, considered by many the best novel of the English language!

A course that lay between undue clemency and excessive rigour: the dispensation in a heterogeneous society of arbitrary classes, incessantly rearranged in terms of greater and lesser social inequality, of unbiassed homogeneous indisputable justice, tempered with mitigants of the widest possible latitude but exactable to the uttermost farthing with confiscation of estate, real and personal, to the crown. Loyal to the highest constituted power in the land, actuated by an innate love of rectitude his aims would be the strict maintenance of public order, the repression of many abuses though not of all simultaneously (every measure of reform or retrenchment being a preliminary solution to be contained by fluxion in the final solution), the upholding of the letter of the law (common, statute and law merchant) against all traversers in covin and trespassers acting in contravention of bylaws and regulations, all resuscitators (by trespass and petty larceny of kindlings) of venville rights, obsolete by desuetude, all orotund instigators of international persecution, all perpetuators of international animosities, all menial molestors of domestic conviviality, all recalcitrant violators of domestic connubiality.
 

Panupat

Well-known member
#16
Lauerd me steres, noght wante sal me:
In stede of fode þare me louked he.
He fed me ouer watre ofe fode,
Mi saule he tornes in to gode.
He led me ouer sties of rightwisenes,
For his name, swa hali es.
For, and ife .I. ga in mid schadw ofe dede,
For þou wiþ me erte iuel sal .i. noght drede;
Þi yherde, and þi stafe ofe mighte,
Þai ere me roned dai and nighte.
Þou graiþed in mi sighte borde to be,

That was Middle English. :cautious:
This sounds kinda cool and mythical. I wish I can pronounce this.